The Finger of God

10/22/11

we've just arrived back in the city from another trip to the village. I believe the longer we are here, the more purposeful each visit becomes. I am beginning to see more and more clearly what God is doing in me and through me during our time there. I am ill-equipped for such a God-sized task, but He always so graciously reminds me that it isn't about me and what I can't do, but about Him and what He has already begun to do.

It was the morning of the third day in the village last week, and I had one of the sweetest, most tender moments with our Heavenly Father. I sleep in a tent in the courtyard and I am normally awake before the sun rises, thanks to the faithful, obnoxious moaning of the family rooster. The sun began to pour its light into the village as I spent a little time reading from the Gospels. One of my first convictions upon arriving in Africa was that I did not know the person and work of Christ like I should. Solution to problem: spend time with Him. After a little while, I finished my reading, put my books up and washed my face and hands. This is custom before speaking to anyone in the morning. By the time I had finished, a nice little gathering of family circled me and we all sat, drinking tea and eating peanuts. I have really come to enjoy this time since it is where I have seen the kids start to open up to me. They like to teach me how to say things in their language and then laugh and giggle when I try to say them. I'm sure it's hilarious to them, I'm kind of like a big, 250 pound baby learning to talk. I laugh right along with them. With each grin and smile, they inch closer and closer to me - literally. They'll scoot and scoot towards me just an inch at a time, pretending all the while to be looking the other way. Sometimes they will even touch me, either rubbing my arm or leg to see what I'll do. I know they are waiting to see if I am anything like the men they know; distant fathers who are only enforcers of discipline and labor. Love and intimacy are unheard of in this culture. But you can see in the children's eyes that - while not yet swallowed up by the lies of the world - they long for the touch only a Father can give.

One boy named Da touched my heart in a very special way. He is timid and gentle, usually keeping his distance most of the time. Da is somewhere around 8-years-old and is the family shepherd. He is responsible for taking all the livestock out to graze for almost 10 hours everyday. There is very little time for a child to be a child in this culture. You grow up fast and work hard while you're at it. On this particular morning, Da was sitting across from me on a bamboo bed. He touched my leg and then turned away. I smiled at him and then turned my atttention back to the other children who were talking to me. Suddenly, I felt the tickle of little fingers wrapping around my pinky finger. It was Da. He retracted his hand and then looked up at me, waiting. It was easy to see he was processing something: was I going to treat him just as everyone else had? Or was there something different about me? Moved to compassion, I reached out my hand for him to take again. He grabbed two fingers that time... then three. Before long, his smile grew from ear to ear and he was giggling. I was overwhelmed with love for him, and in that instant, I remembered the day I took hold of my Heavenly Father's hand. I remembered the hesitation and the fear I had of being hurt. Love and intimacy with God were joys completely foreign to myself at the time, but something stronger than my fear drew me in. I remembered the day I first trusted Him and grabbed the finger of His gentle, merciful hand as He offered it to me. It was like nothing I had ever imagined.

I knew Da's smile all too well. It was the smile of a child who felt safe and loved. I find the same smile on my own face when I am walking hand in hand with God. It was in that moment that God showed me how it was going to be the little things that influence a soul for eternity. I may not be a great teacher or evangelist, but I can offer myself as an outstretched hand, safe and gentle, full of His loving compassion. I can be His pinky finger for Da. I know this will be how He reaches for the lives of these little ones to bring them back to Himself.